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I've been quite overweight for a long time. That's not a secret. At some point, i decided it was o.k. because i was not gaining. I wore the same size, weighed the same weight, i thought i had reasonable physical ability, and i definitely didn't want to do the lose weight - gain weight - lose weight - gain weight thing, so i just kept doing things the way i was doing them. Recently, i noticed that i am now gaining weight - rapidly. And suddenly, i had new light. Also, since i have been blessed with the privilege of not working outside the home, i really have no excuse in the exercise department. So, i'm instituting some resolute habit changes....exercise - calorie restriction - and so forth. Also - another peek into the mind of me - in the past i have had a hard time focusing on my body without losing focus spiritually. That's another reason i haven't done anything about my weight: i would rather be an overweight Christian than a skinny sinner. So this time

There's something about the aroma of cloves and ginger and cinnamon that makes me feel a little more Christmas-y, even if it is 65 degrees outside the day before Christmas Eve. I've been baking adventurously, meaning i'm baking things i've never baked before or things that i haven't baked in so long that i may as well have never baked them. I had to work up to it for a few days, but i decided to try making my own pepparkakor. I had to work up to it because i already know that it is not the kind of recipe that anyone is likely to really get right on the first try. I don't remember ever seeing my mom mess it up, but she has had a lot more practice, and she can speak Swedish to the cookies. I think that helps. The part where you actually mix the dough isn't too hard. One of the ingredients is the "peel and juice of half an orange." Thank God my mom wrote in that that means about 2 tablespoons. It took me a whole orange to get that much juice. A

Today, my husband and i plan to go Christmas shopping. Yes, i know this is the 20th, but this is when it's getting done. Our plan is to leave at 6 am so we can beat the crowd to Wal-Mart and then hopefully the other crowds to the stores that open later in the morning. And for whatever reason, i awoke at 3:30 and couldn't go back to sleep. So, here i am. This morning, i'm remembering Christmases at home when i was a girl. It was very simple, and i liked it. Often, or maybe usually, we didn't have a lot of money. And often my gifts were homemade. And generally there were only a couple or a few. And i can't think of a single time when i was disappointed. Somehow, by the grace of God, my parents instilled in me the true meaning of Christmas. Don't get me wrong. I really liked the gifts, but i valued the time and intimacy more. Some Christmases were just me and my parents, and i liked that. That's a concept that seems foreign to me now. With James

last July, when James and i went to michigan for a family reunion, my grandmother was making an afghan. she's always making an afghan, but this one was a particular color of green that my husband admired. he told mormor that that was his favorite color. then about a month ago, that finished afghan arrived in the mail from my mother. she said it was a house-warming gift. james immediately claimed the afghan as his own. forget that it was for "us." it became his. i told my mom about it, and she asked what colors i would like in an afghan. this afternoon, a most devastatingly beautiful afghan arrived in the mail for me from my mom. it was made just for me. that makes me feel special. every Christmas, when i was a kid, my mom made pepparkakor. i think kakor is the swedish word for cookies. so i think pepparkakor means spice cookies. basically we're talking about very thin gingerbread cookies with a much milder flavor than say ginger snaps or american gingerb

There's something very suspicious about all this car company bailout business that's going on right now. I'll put aside, for the moment, whether i think that the government should ever have their hand in corporate business to begin with. Does it make sense to anyone out there that car businesses are going under? Do you have a lot of friends who have decided to stop buying cars? Is anyone turning, for environmental reasons, back to the horse and buggy method? No, of course they're not. Here's my concern. Ford, GM, and Chrysler are not going out of business because they can't sell cars. Ford, GM, and Chrysler are going out of business because the unions are out of control. I understand that the labor unions were very important in the early 1900s. At first, unions represented the common blue collar worker's right to earn a living and to be paid his worth. I commend the American spirit that birthed that movement, and I'm proud of it. But now the la

today is my second day home. yesterday, i couldn't keep myself inside the house. even though it was a mess and desperately needed my attention, i just couldn't ignore the beautiful out of doors. so my house is still a mess. today, the very insistent rain storm has persuaded me to stay indoors. sadly, i don't feel very well, so i'm having a hard time making much headway. i started to go visit meme yesterday, but when i peaked through the woods, i saw david heading over there and decided to stay home. probably won't make it over today since i don't think i want to wade through all the cats and dogs falling from the sky. i'm a little bored and just a little bit lost because i haven't gotten into my routine yet. i would like to get everything cleaned up and start decorating for Christmas. i got my first Christmas card in the mail yesterday, so i'm inspired. also, i'm determined to get my own Christmas cards mailed out this week, and i'm

I love the development of sense of humor in children. When they're really little, any unusual noise is funny. When they get a little older, anything that sounds like someone might've passed gas is hilarious ! At some point in early grade school, they start telling jokes that go something like, Hey, why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had dirt on it! Hahahahahahahaha! to which you have to laugh just because they're so tickled about nothing. As time goes on, they're jokes get a little funnier, and knock knock jokes get ever more popular. But i just love watching the progression of their understanding of what is funny. In my recent opportunity to babysit my neighbor's three year old twins, i have developed a new joke in regard to childrens' humor development. Up until now, i haven't been able to share it with anyone. I am going to share it with you so that you can think it's funny too. While babysitting, i watched a LOT of children's

today, at 3 ish in the afternoon, i was relieved of my post...permanently. 146 hours in a row. whew! the kids' dad finally called this morning around 10 to say he was on his way home. apparently some supplies failed to arrive in time, and he was delayed in beginning his work. even before we heard from him, however, my loving man had his fill of missing his wife and declared that i should not return to babysit the neighbor children. humbly, i submit. and now i am kind of sad. i don't think you get to spend that much time with children and not get attached, not if you're human and contain a warm heart. jillian actually made it through the last couple of days without getting in really big trouble for anything. this is breakthrough! i don't think the kids understood that i wasn't coming back. i think i'll probably slip over next time james is at work and give them hugs. good for me if not for them. =) i also got to know meme, and i'll probably visit her

o.k. this is thursday. according to the prescribed plan, i should be writing on my blog today to tell how my 3 1/2 day of day and nights taming the zoo went. sadly, i cannot tell you because the time has been extended. how long? i don't know. per the dispatcher for the place where the kids' dad works, weather may be keeping the helicopter from transporting him back to shore. she thinks it'll be friday. eh if you think i'm a wimp after only 3 days, o.k. i don't care. but it must be easier to care for your own children in your own home with your own loving man at your side and your own bedroom to sleep in at night. right? at least a little better? come on! mostly the kids are pretty sweet; they just happen to be three. the potty training is going o.k. jill has a belligerent streak which translates to potty training also. jack is a whiner but easily persuaded if i put my foot down about something. and he likes to wear underwear and go to the potty. jill,

well, my suspicions were correct. absence of the older child makes everything easier. the twins let me sleep until ten o'clock this morning (the grace of God i think), and are now quietly playing in my living room while i attempt to pay bills and clean house for my loving man. i had a really hard time going to sleep at their house last night - and an even harder time staying asleep. i woke up at 3 am and jack (the boy twin) heard me, woke up, and asked for cookies. =) some things never leave the mind. i got up to get the 7 year old, skyler, off to school and then went back to sleep. about 7, jack saw my eyes slit open slightly and again asked for cookies. i told him i wanted them to sleep for a few more minutes and then i would give them cookies. (i'm really a very bad babysitter). somewhere close to 10 a.m. i noticed the rustling of little bodies near by. when i finally dared to eyeball them, they were both sitting up in bed staring silently at me with expectant grins