About that other entry i deleted...

Thanks to all of you who left comments about my questions! I really really appreciate the input.

A couple of things for an update:
While i was in church last Sunday, i already felt like i should come back one more time. Also, in listening to God about the weird newcomer's situation, i felt like it would be wise to have a personal conversation with someone in leadership, instead of writing to who knows who reads those. I have someone in mind, but i'm not ready to talk yet.

Although, part of me seriously suggested that i stay home this morning, i instead, attended women's group. I enjoyed it a lot. And i really really liked the women there. There were ten women, ranging in age from 23 to 60-something. They've just started going through a book together. It's Utmost Living, by Tim Storey. I am now trying to buy the book on ebay. The chapter we read today was about matching your purpose, passion, and priorities. It really really spoke to me and helped me.
One of the leader-women gave me a volunteer paper - where you read about the beliefs of the church so that you can say you agree with them, submit your personal information and share how you might be willing to serve, and also there's a part about a background check. I didn't ask for the paper, but i was glad she gave it to me. If there had been no opportunities for volunteering, i probably would never have gone back. I'm hoping there are some reaching out type of opportunities too. But...before i fill out that form, i think i'm going to check out a couple of other churches in the area. But tomorrow, i intend to go to this same church again.

As Josh hinted at, it's hard to move on from CTK without adjusting your expectations. And i'm not completely sold on this place. Something inside of me really wants to look around and make sure before i make a commitment on any level. So unless God speaks to me otherwise, i'll probably continue with this women's group and maybe even their midweek service but start visiting some other churches on Sunday- and maybe small groups.

I did learn today that because the pastor is pastoring two churches, they're not doing it the way CTK did it. The main pastor comes and preaches sometimes, but the rest of the time, they kind of rotate around between several people. And if they're having a special speaker (such as Tim Storey) at the parent church, they'll often simulcast it to this church, so the little church doesn't miss out. I'm pretty sure i can be o.k. with that - mainly because the intimate leadership comes from the small group, and that's what has always been more important to me that who's preaching anyway.

O.k. that's all for now. My brain isn't working very fast, and it has taken me quite a while to get this much down.